I am a personal trainer. It is my job to design ass kicking workouts, provide nutritional advice to produce long lasting results, and to emotionally support my clients through their weight loss struggle. I listen. I suggest. I push each person beyond what they think they are capable of. I search for answers to client's questions. And I develop programs that will burn fat, build muscle, and help each person obtain the body they will feel comfortable in.

Listening is the most important fundamental aspect of my job. I listen and I absorb. My goal is to provide my clients an environment where they can say anything, feel everything, cry, smile, be angry, be happy, push and pull, kick and scream, give in, give up, rise above, move forward, stand still, and be everything they were meant to be.

I am empathetic. I feel and see everything my clients struggle with. I love my job. I am happy. I do feel as if I was meant to do this, that training is my calling, and that I was given a gift to nurture and build and to utilize to its full potential.

I stand my client's side as a coach and a friend. It's important to me that they know that I am their go to person. I am there through victory and defeat. I can be called on when will power is sinking deep into habitual self-destruction. I stand by each of their sides wide open, vulnerable, exposed, and sympathetic.

The difficulty of my job lies in the fact that I can only do my part in the equation of successful weight loss. I provide the curriculum, I kick their butt in the gym, and I stand their as their friend and their trainer. But I cannot lose the weight for them. I cannot stop them from sabotaging their nutritional game plan. I cannot workout with them 7 days a week. I do not have all of the answers.

Today I am frustrated. I am sad. I have wavering hope. I want to hold each client's hand and stand right by their side and watch the weight fall off and know that there's always a way and that there are many options, and that hope is not loss. I want weight loss to be easier, less of a struggle, and I wish for life to slow down just a bit so my clients can take a breath, reorganize their priorities, and begin moving forward again. I wish for my clients better coping skills, stress management, a full 8 hours of sleep, healthier nutritional choices when traveling, and one hour every day to themselves. I want each to realize that if health is not their #1 priority and that they are unable to cope with the twists and turns of life, making fitness a lifestyle will seem insurmountably impossible.

I am a trainer. It is my job to provide my clients with the skills necessary to obtain a fit and healthy body and mind. Today, I feel helpless, wishing there was a way that I could help more, push harder, and cook every client's meals. Today, it became blatantly clear that I cannot be the only one doing the work and that it really is the responsibility of the client to put forth the necessary effort in order to burn fat and live fit and healthy. Today I realized that even if the client is doing the work, the body may rebel and that the struggles and obstacles of life may be stronger than the client's fight.

And all I can do is keep on listening and keep on pushing.