I am sure you all know what's it like to loose your groove. Some call it Mojo, or flow, or routine....I call it groove. Loosing my groove can completely stop me in my tracks, leave me disoriented, then standing in front of the mirror staring at my reflection with evil eyes trying to find an angle that does not make me feel fat and worthless. (I'm an honest girl)
Between the two injuries I have so infamously struggled with in 2010 and then this out of the blue gall bladder surgery, I thought my groove would never come back. However, it has poked it's little head around the corner and light is not the only thing it now can see.
I am running again! (Imagine me dancing in the living room right now to Madonna.) I am also able to workout in the gym. Of course there are still some guidelines and a few restrictions; however for the most part I am able to sweat and feel like an athlete again. Woo hoo! Also, I can take classes again. Cautious? Yes, but I am now able to participate in group x classes without fear of damaging myself for good. I use light weights. I do not perform push ups (Stephanie T did about 75 push ups in Pump Raw yesterday. @#$%^&!) And when it comes to squats and lunges, I follow my own advise and front load the bar or do not use any weight at all. I have learned to problem solve. I learned this from a special person in my life. He said being an athlete is all about problem solving. It's not about if there's a problem when exercising or racing. He said it's about when there's a problem, what are you going to do? Wow! This is one of the best pieces of advice I have ever received.
Finding my groove again has helped me not only in my personal life but especially at work. Forgive me for saying this - however I have admitted this in the past - but I have held anger and resentment towards others because they get to workout and I do not. I am so sorry for this, but this is the truth. But now that's dissipating and I feel like I am back in line with all of the other amazing athletes at Pure Austin. I now feel fit, strong, and worthy of clients. (I know I have always been worthy but I have not felt like it at all.)
I will still have my moments of feeling rhythm-less. There will be days when my shoulder is aching terribly and I know I pushed it a bit too far in a workout, for my ability to take it easy is still a struggle. My IT band will still be tight here and there after a run; however this will be relieved from adequate stretching and rest, though still an art form that is a work in progress. At times I am still too hard on myself, judging myself because I am unable to keep up with the pace of the lead pack or take Shirly's slash class, or get down to the floor and perform every push up Stephanie demands of her students.
I can say the greatest thing I have learned in the past 8 months is the value of understanding what my body can do. I may never be able to do man push ups again or eat lamb now that I don't have a gall bladder; however, I can do so many other things why focus on what I cannot? I believe this is one of the problems with the fitness industry and how the media hypes up the process of getting in shape. I too will get intimidated by infomercials and the new trends of fitness for the intensity that is thrown in your face can make any one feel like if they can't be 100% why be anything at all.
Building strength and losing weight is a life long process that can be broken down in incremental steps that will create monumental movements. One step at a time...at your own pace...in your own race...doing what you can do! That's what it's all about.
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